Thursday, 3 July 2008


I recently switched to a new medication due to not being able to sleep at night. All this medication does is numb my awareness and makes me care less about what is happening to me. It's the same with all anti-psychotic medication.

However, I have recently bought a new book titled 'Orthomolecular Treatment for Schizophrenia'. Now I haven't been diagnosed with Schizophrenia, but I've been told I "SHOW SIGNS" of Schizophrenia.

Apparently people with Schizophrenia believe such things as 'cameras watching them in the TV", "Messages from Satellites via the TV".

To me it's all spiritual and the same dark force which torments me, controls the media and can deceive mentally ill people into thinking such things as camera and satellite abuse.

Here's an example of how the dark master works:-

He can put thoughts into your mind, then abuse you through another under his control for thoughts you think are your own.

Things were VERY difficult for me early on, I was going through about 50-100 coincidences a day. I would think a sentence in my mind and the final word of the sentence would be exactly the same word as on the tv at exactly the same time. This really puzzled me. During that time an album came out called SYNCHRONIZED (like many albums that have dodgy titles) which caused me more confusion. But with the help of a Jehovah Witness (Telling me the Devil controls the media) and my own god given abilities I saw what was happening to me. I was wrestling with the DEVIL.

Afterwards, times changed and the SYCHRONIZATION with the TV moved on to new things and new satanic tricks. Right now it is seemingly meaningless sentences, that make sense at later times in my life.

According to my C.P.N my experience happens to 1 in every 100,000 people. Whether that is true remains a mystery as I no longer 100% trust ANYONE. If it is true though then the chances of someone like me reading this is at best 0.001% of readers.

Sunday, 18 May 2008


Well this month marked my ten year anniversary since becoming 'ill'. Although I don't accept that everything I have experienced is due to illness. I believe there IS a devil and his minion in this world RIGHT NOW. I believe they are running the show, and anyone on God's side is having their faith tested to the max. I know I am anyway. I have strayed from my faith many times and theorized on my Enemy being a spiritual alien race but I always come back to God. I wrestle with an evil in my mind all day, everyday. I cannot remember what it was like to have mental peace. My goal is to perservere to the end and hope for the best. I believe Jesus to be the Christ and through the word he spoke I was told I will be stable until the end. (The End I believe to be when I pass away, NOT the end of the world). I feel a huge connection to God's word, it truly is amazing that a group of letters and gospels written over 2000 years ago can speak to me about what I'm going through right now as though they were written by a loved one recently who knows me so well.

Friday, 11 April 2008

Please check out my original blog to see what i'm all about. I have suffered almost my whole life in one way or another, but the last 10 years have been hell for me. So please check it out and I will continue my posts here. .